#Let'sTalk! [iDey#1]

March 14, 2016

#Let'sTalk! [iDey#1]

#MarriagePlus:

After a long and lengthy argument, a neutral person (with a listening ear, sitting by) now put a bridge to the argument by asking: “so then, what is the right and appropriate and just way for a woman to find a man for marriage?”

Well, the answer is this: I for one have not seen anywhere it is stated that a woman needs to “find” a man for marriage. Not one. The closest I have seen is a woman may need to “choose” the right man, especially where there’s traffic of suitors available. (this, anyways, should be done in prayer and sure counsel); BUT the job of the lady is to “make” herself “wife-able”, if I should say: “wifeably available”. A man does the finding. And believe you me, if he looks at the settings and sees a lady that currently spends about 50k per month (or more) for her upkeep, my brother would go home and do the math: “after I must have made the regular expenses for the family, I will need to make an additional 50k (or more) every month for her upkeep…hmmm?”; the “finding” is not by force, my brother will most probably look another direction! (DON’T GET IT WRONG, brothers, fellas, if you have the money MAKE IT RAIN on her, till she seeks an umbrella!); BUT we are looking at the average, most realistic circumstances, no wishful thinking!

Now to make the story more interesting, most sisters (in bid of desperation, YES!) open their doors (even before THE GRACE is said) to most potential grooms-to-be, and it’s most likely that our brothers (in this circumstance, like most do today), would most wish to eat his cake and have it back! A man does the finding. This keeps a lot of sisters vulnerable, more so why these days most ladies seek “alternative measures” to solve the problem; that is to say: diverse means to “trap” men via various ways like diabolism, witchcraft, marine manipulations, mind controlling spells, “get pregnant for him”, to mention but a few. BUT believe me, such mediums may work for a time, and time again, but will crash in the long run; yours truly is a witness!

So what then? What then is the solution? For the ladies the solution is simple: We can’t beat the methods and prospects our fathers, and mothers applied to issues of marriage (YES! call me old fashioned) but we are still living in the same planet that they lived in, we have not changed planets? We are still in the same Earth! (ipads, selfies, High heels, and fabulous make-ups, can’t change this fact!) In the days of our fathers and mothers, it is forbidden for a man to sleep with a bride-to-be before their wedding (or at least before the bride price is paid). I mean, brothers of today might find this (write-up) very difficult or offensive, BUT hey! Calm down! This I write mostly for the ladies, because the vulnerability is getting too much! I was interviewing a young lady some time (not quite long), and she confided in me and told me that a lot of men have come her way, but most unfortunately it most ends up in nothing. And I was like “like how many?” she said “many”, inquisitively I pushed further, I asked “like 10?” she said “more than 10”, that shocked me a bit, but I was in for more shock when I asked again “like 20?” and she said “more than 20…” Wow! Something said to me “stop asking!” but like Abraham soliciting for the salvation from destruction coming upon Sodom, I asked once more “…emm, like 50?” and she said…”more than 50…” Jiminy Cricket! Of a sure at this point I had to shut my mouth, but she dropped the last bomb when she said “they are uncountable…” Wow! Then I knew there was a problem! This lady was less than 35, well mannered, well trained, good looking, good job, etcetera.

Now what is the problem?

The logic is simple: Every single man is a potential husband. I mean: ONE SINGLE BROTHER, (just 1) is a potential groom-to-be. Everything now depends on THE ARCHITECTURE of how this ONE BROTHER is managed! The first NO NO is sex. When a brother sleeps with a woman (I mean, I mean, I’m a brother, a changed one though) the likely hood of him continuing in that relationship for the purpose of making it permanent is 2:20; that means only 2 brothers out of 20 can do it, that’s 20 out of 200! (exclude the implications of above mentioned issues where with some ladies apply, thus: diabolical and dubious ways) I mean, it’s not all ladies that are diabolical, some just apply the everyday worldly strategy like most would do, which I can assure you will fall like a pack of cards in today’s world! The world has changed! The world now is more spiritual than physical. Ladies, be strong, stand your ground, if he loves you he will respect that fact about you (I guess you know what I mean).

The second NO NO never think you can “buy” or “bribe” a brother into marriage. It will fail. Most times for the “good” of the brother, I call it ‘good’ (even though it is not good) because the brother will take off, profiting from the transaction, while most times for the lady, the transaction will still be “processing”! Ladies stand your ground. It’s a thing of FAITH: “Faith now is a substance…an evidence…”; The substantially of every “evidence” is proof! He has to prove it! Despite the odds. If you can’t “prove” it, it can’t stand as evidence! Don’t be afraid! If he can’t stand this proof, let him go. He isn't yours!

The third NO NO never think you can “trap” a brother via diabolical or dubious means; YES! Hear me all ye that do it! it will fail! Worst of all in the long run! And you will be left in a dilemma; worst case with nothing; or a hand full of children at best! You can’t cheat nature (as our fathers used to say); if you try to ‘cheat’ nature, nature is the chief gambler, the “house” always wins! Nature will leave you alone, but wait for you ahead; (True!).

So what then? What do we do?